GONE WITH THE WIND FABULOUS


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humansofnewyork:

"My friend came up to me and said: ‘Alfredo! There’s some guy over there jerking off in front of women and kids.’ So I ran up to this guy, and I said: ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing? Put your shit back in your pants and get the fuck out of the park!’ And he stood up, and he got in my face, and he started to say: ‘Fuck you!’ But after he said ‘fuck,’ and before he said ‘you,’ I clocked him right in the face and knocked him out. When the cops came, I told them the story, and they said: ‘You better get out of here before the boss gets here.’ So I left the park, but this guy’s tooth was lodged in my hand. And he had some sort of infection. Cause two days later, my legs swell up like balloons, and I’ve barely been able to walk since."
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Anonymous asked: One time i went to olive garden with my mom and she told me she was alcoholic and then the next time we went she told me that she was divorcing my dad

olivegarden:

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crissle:

efficientenough:

poopflow:

*oitnb theme song plays* *runs 3 miles* *takes 2 hour nap* *goes out to dinner* *comes back and takes a shower* *episode starts*

you’ve got time

God I hate that theme song.

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missveryvery:

same guy who said this

he’s my fucking hero
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crissle:

thechanelmuse:

lovestodeepthroat:

lmsig:

realitybeyondthesenses:

LMAO

And nobody is gonna say anything to her either lol

not a gatdamn thing.

But they can’t tho. 

Hunting for the lie.
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crissle:

how about you just give me all of them.
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meladoodle:

meladoodle:

meladoodle:

my granddad just called me to tell me how big his cauliflowers are growing and it was so cute theyre “TWICE as big as the ones you get in the shop”

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i told my granddad this post has 3,500 notes and he said ‘who are they? do i know them?’ he wanted me to list everyone and see if he knew anyone

(Source: meladoodle, via crissle)

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